Why Boudoir Photography?

Why Boudoir Photography?

All photos shown in this BLOG post are of me!
photo credit: Tamara Knight Photography

I did not seek out boudoir photography. In fact, quite the opposite. I was an award-winning portrait photographer with over 10 years’ experience when boudoir found me. One of my brides asked me to photograph a boudoir session for her and I said yes. After 10 years of photographing all genres of photography, I figured I could do this one too.  How different could this be from a regular portrait session?  Well, other than the client will be next to naked in front of me and very nervous. From the first moment of my first capture, I felt something very special inside me as an artist and as a woman.  It was like I was watching a flower bloom and I was there to document the metamorphosis. Almost a surreal experience. There she was looking nervous and scared, and there I was encouraging her, guiding her, and helping her feel relaxed, free, sensual, and beautiful. It felt so natural and easy.

The images were breathtaking, so feminine and lovely. When I showed her the back of the camera, she couldn’t believe her eyes. “Who is that?  Is that really me?” She welled up with tears and so did I. “That’s you” I said, “And you are incredibly beautiful”. From then on it was pure magic and I can tell you for sure that when she left from our session, I don’t think her feet were touching the ground. She looked different to me. Her posture was better. She walked differently, she talked differently. She could look at you straight in the eye. She looked like she knew she was beautiful and could finally say that about herself. She looked like a woman full of confidence and owning her beauty. She was transformed.  As she left, I thought, “I did that”. “I did that with my art”, and I don’t think my feet were touching the ground either!

When I realized that, with my photography, I could truly help women believe in their beauty and see themselves differently. To see themselves as “beautiful”, and to rebuild their self-esteem and confidence, it was a game changer.  Because it no longer was about creating a pretty picture. It was about so much more. I had found my true calling as an artist…by accident.

why me?

I know, first-hand, that women are super critical of themselves. That when we look in the mirror, we are looking for flaws.   And that all those insecurities rise to the surface when you shed your clothes and it’s just you, vulnerable you. I get that.

I am that too. In fact, I grew up with very low self-esteem.  I grew up in a large family and being a middle child with a weight problem I felt invisible.   I didn’t get the attention, my pretty, thin, older sister got.   Nobody really looked at me, they looked right through me like I wasn’t even there.   My older sister barely acknowledged me, and my mother constantly compared me to her.  “If I could just lose the weight” she used to say.  To me, this meant, I was unworthy of her love as I was, and most certainly unworthy of my own love for myself.  I share this family portrait because it truly represents how I felt growing up.  This portrait was a large portrait that hung prominently in our home for many years.   You can see that I am out of focus in the front. My mother selected this particular portrait, I am sure the professional photographer had a selection to choose from. She picked the one with me in front, big and blurry.  I look completely out of place, like a last-minute addition,  and somewhat invisible.  Family portraits are meant to foster a sense of belonging and the love of family.   Unfortunately, this one had the opposite effect on me. 

The Transformation

It took me until after I left my childhood house as an adult (23) and on my own that I lost the weight. When men started to look at me, I thought they were looking at someone else.  I kept looking behind me!  It took me a long time to believe what I was seeing in the mirror.  I kept seeing the ugly fat girl, unworthy of a second look.  It was a slow process, but I got there. Finally, able to feel “beautiful”. Finally, being called “beautiful”.   It was a long time before I could accept a compliment and not brush it off.  It was a long time before I felt “beautiful”.  I learned that the word “beautiful’ is a real trigger for me and how it makes me feel about myself.  It has been a long journey of self-acceptance and self-love.  And quite frankly, I still do struggle with this from time to time.   Those negative thoughts do occasionally seep into my head and play those old tapes of unworthiness and self-doubt.   Looking in the mirror and saying out loud that I am “beautiful” is still difficult for me at times.  But what I have learned over the years, is that beauty comes from within.  It isn’t up to anyone else to determine your value, your worth, or whether you are beautiful. It is totally and completely up to you. 

I have come to realize that there is power in beauty and beauty in power.  I have learned just how incredibly resilient women are, and that I am.  We can overcome many obstacles, endure many hardships, and still shine bright.  It is a gift that all women share.  We all have access to a “beautiful” inner light of confidence.

When I was truly able to see my beauty and believe in myself,  I became keenly aware of the beauty of others.  It is exactly why boudoir photography is such a good fit for me.  With my artist’s eye for beauty and my desire to help other women,  it balances all the negative beliefs I had about myself and my past.  Without those trials of confidence in my youth,  I would not be the woman I am today,  nor have the empathy for other women in need of a confidence boost.   I feel incredibly blessed to have found boudoir photography as my career, or should I say,  it found me. 

My boudoir photo shoot 

To be honest,  I was shooting boudoir for 5 years before I was ready to step in front of the camera myself.  I knew I had to do it.  I knew I needed to know what it felt like for my clients. I owed it to them and I owed it to myself.   How could I authentically instill confidence in other women if I wasn’t able to step outside of my own comfort zone?   

So I decided to go to a photographer friend of mine in Orlando, Tamara Knight, and I put my sensitive self-image into her capable hands.   Needless to say, I was riddled with anxiety, all of those old insecurities rose to the surface.   Will I look alright?   Am I too fat?   Am I too old?  I hate my hair.  I hate my body.   All of those silly negative thoughts were spiraling around in my head, and I felt like I was stepping off a cliff!   But Tamara, made me feel comfortable immediately and calmed my nerves, loaded me up with tons of encouragement and compliments, and those tapes in my mind were silenced.   Replaced with positive feelings and thoughts about myself.  I love sharing my portraits from that session.  I love everything about them.   It was validation of everything I was hoping it would be.  And the proof of my growth as a woman and a celebration of my own self-love. 

It’s not selfish to have self-love, it’s necessary in order to become the best possible version of yourself. 

I have been on both sides of the camera in boudoir photography, and I can tell you from experience that when you are with the right professional, the journey is truly transformational. 

Interested in booking a boudoir experience with us?

come join our private women's only facebook community!

Our women’s only Facebook Group is all about uplifting each other. We share our hopes, dreams, inspiration, successes, and losses. We are a sisterhood of strong women willing to lend a helping hand to each other and enrich each other’s lives.

Top 13 Most Frequently Asked Questions about Boudoir Photography

Top 13 Most Frequently Asked Questions about Boudoir Photography

  1. Do you share my images?

No. Not unless you have given permission with a model release. We understand the very personal and intimate nature of these portraits, so this decision is yours to make, not ours.  Of course, we always want you to feel free to share them, and by sharing them you can inspire other women to do these kinds of transformational self-love and confidence-boosting sessions, but the decision to do this is all yours.  We understand that even if you want to share them that you may be bound by morality clauses where you work, so we would never want to jeopardize your job.

  1. What type of shoots do you offer?

We offer 3 session types.  For those ladies who really want it all, we have a full day Luxury Boudoir  session where we book the studio for the entire day with you. We do 5 or more looks, professional hair and makeup artistry for the whole day, a catered lunch and complimentary champagne.  Our most popular session is our Personal Boudoir  session.  This includes 3 different outfits, professional hair and makeup artistry for all 3 looks, complimentary champagne, and same day reveal and selection. Our  Boudoir Lite  session  includes one outfit/look for ladies that want to just give boudoir a try or may want to take advantage of one of our themed shoots that we offer throughout the year. For this session you come with your hair and makeup already done or you can add-on our professional hair and makeup artistry to your session fee.

  1. How long does a shoot last?

Our Lite Boudoir session typically last about 2 hours. Our Personal Boudoir shoots are about 4 hours with an hour portrait selection portion. Our Luxury Boudoir sessions usually run from 10am – 5pm..for a full day of confidence boosting, pampering and fun!

4. Is hair and makeup included?

We offer full in-studio hair and makeup artistry for our Personal and Luxury Boudoir sessions. It is an add-on to the Lite boudoir session. If you are getting hair and makeup artistry done in the studio, you will come with your hair washed and dried the night before so it’s clean but has texture to it. You come with your face moisturized and clean with no makeup for a blank canvas for our artist. We work as a collaborative team in my studio, so if you have a specific request, we ask you to speak up and we’ll all work together to make you look your absolute best, and still look like you.

5. Do I bring my own lingerie?

You can if you like, but I have a very extensive wardrobe collection. I am somewhat of a lingerie junkie (lol!) and I have learned from experience what outfits will look best on certain body types.  I feel the lingerie is very important to the boudoir experience and the outfit is just the beginning in helping you feel feminine and beautiful. I love having a collection of outfits that will fit woman of all sizes from XS – 5X. The custom lingerie fitting and selection is part of all of my session options and included in your initial in person consultation.

6. Do I have to wear lingerie?

Nope. If you prefer to go a more glamour route with a dress and a more Vanity Fair magazine style shoot, we can do that too. If you prefer to wear a man’s shirt, your partner’s favorite sport’s jersey, a big sweater, a ripped T-shirt and jeans, or nothing but a white sheet, we can do that too! The whole idea to help you look and feel beautiful, and whatever that is, that is what we will go with. All of this is discussed during your in person consultation or on a Zoom call where we can custom design your dream shoot and explore all aspects of your personality.   

7. Do you have payment plans?

Yes we do! We always want you to get what you want and to work within your budget.

PRE-SESSION payment plan means you pay in advance for your product purchase. We go over the collections at your in-person consultation, and you choose the one that you want. The benefit is that you can get an extra portrait based on the collection level of your choice. You can choose a 3-month, 6-month, or 9-month plan. Your credit card is charged automatically.  You have your session at the end of your payment plan and we choose your portraits the same day. Then we have your products edited, printed, and delivered to you within 3-4 weeks. 

POST-SESSION payment plan means that we have your session and you pick your portraits the same day. You can then choose your collection and make a  20% deposit. You then choose a 3-month, 6-month, or 9-month plan. Your credit card will be charged automatically and once your final payment is made, your products will be edited, printed, and delivered in 3-4 weeks. 

Either plan is meant to break up your payments so that you can fit them into your budget and make it work.

You’d do this for your children or your spouse..wouldn’t you? So why not for you? 

8. I don’t know how to pose, will you help?

Absolutely! I give super easy-to-follow instructions and coach you from your facial expression down to the placement of your fingers. I WILL NOT say “look sexy” or “work the camera” or any other vague directions like that. It’s my job to guide you through the process, and I will be there for you every step of the way, literally. I will mirror the pose for you , so I am right there with you posing. If I can do it, you can do it! However, many of these positions are not normal for most women, so prepare to be a little sore..lol!

9. Do you Photoshop my images?

Yes, I will always retouch your images. During our sales session we will discuss how much editing you would like done. It is always my goal for you to believe in your beauty, even without the retouch, so your portrait selections are always done without any retouching. Right out of the camera.  Your beauty is not created in Photoshop. The retouching just gives you the best version, the fantasy version, the version you know you could be and can be. It is the version your loved ones see of you every day. You are the one who focuses on your flaws. So these retouched and edited images are yours to replace those old negative beliefs about your beauty and worth and replace them with beautiful and glorious portraits. Because dammit you are BEAUTIFUL!

10. Do you offer digitals?

Yes. All of our printed collections include their corresponding digital file. I am a firm believer in the printed portrait.  There is tremendous validation to your beauty and self-love when you can experience your portrait printed. Digital is nice for sharing with others but printed will NEVER go out of style and will stand the test of time. As a digital photographer,  all of my art, talent and expertise is captured within the digital file, this is my product as a professional photographer in the digital age. However, digital media changes with technology, and the print is the memory for you to have and to hold and to look at time and again. The printed portrait is your gift to you.

11. What type of printed products do you have?

We offer a variety of high-end printed products included print folios, albums, empowerment crystals, wall art, calendars, and love notes. Our most popular product is the Little Black Book. It’s a discrete little album jam packed with your gorgeous portraits that is perfect for enjoying, and for putting away when not in use. It comes with either a premium leather , fabric,  acrylic or satin photo cover. All of my albums include a gift satchel or gift box perfect for storing and for gifting. You can choose to be more discrete or you can go big, the choice is always yours. Our empowerment crystals are a great way to enjoy your portrait with an inspirational quote right on your dresser of nightstand. Wall art  is becoming more popular for bedrooms and walk-in closets. It’s private, yet very person. I have 3 wall art pieces in my bedroom over my bed from my own boudoir session!

12. I’m freaking out! How can I calm my nerves?

Trust me I know how you feel! I have been in front of the camera in a boudoir session myself. All of your insecurities come to the surface. I get it. You are nervous and excited all at the same time. My best advice is to take some deep breathes, stop looking in the mirror and trust me and my team to work our magic on you. As soon as you begin your hair and makeup you will start to relax. We’ll have your favorite music playing, you’ll get to sip some champagne. It will be like hanging out with your girlfriends. I promise, you will have fun!

13. Where is your studio located?

My boutique studio is located in beautiful, sunny,  Jupiter Florida. 1615 South Cypress Drive, Suite #3, Jupiter, FL 33469. It is a beautiful and feminine space that is private and easy to get to.

interested in booking a boudoir experience with us?

come join our private women's only facebook community

Our women’s only Facebook Group is all about uplifting each other. We share our hopes, dreams, inspiration, successes, and losses. We are a sisterhood of strong women willing to lend a helping hand to each other and enrich each other’s lives.

Busting Excuses for Boudoir

Busting Excuses for Boudoir

When we feel ourselves getting close to our everyday comfort zone boundaries – we get nervous. Nervous about those unknown activities that we really want to try but aren’t sure if we can do it. By doubting ourselves, the excuses start popping up. Excuses of why you shouldn’t do something. It’s our comfort zone trying to keep us safe. But what if we started to focus on the positive reasons for doing something? What if we began saying all the benefits of stepping outside that comfort zone? That is truly where the magic happens. That is when and where we truly feel alive. Making yourself a priority isn’t selfish, it’s necessary.

 So let’s bust the 5 major excuses we tell ourselves that keep us from experiencing a boudoir session.

Excuse #1: “I don’t look good in photos or selfies”

It’s important to remember that a professional photographer is going to be photographing you. In my case, my specialty is women’s portraiture. Women at any age, women at any size, women at any confidence level. Because I enjoy helping women see the best versions of themselves, their fantasy fabulous selves. Yesterday is gone, and tomorrow is not promised, so I believe it’s important to celebrate who you are right now! I’ll tell you a little secret ladies, every single one of YOU is perfect, just the way you are. That being said, it’s my job to accentuate you best features and to minimize your sensitive areas. I will pose you and use my lighting expertise to light you in the most flattering way, and to take the photo at the correct angle that lets your beauty shine. When you step into my private boudoir studio, you don’t have to know “how to pose” because I will gently guide you through the process with all that I have learned from my experience and education. I always tell my ladies when we begin our sessions to just “feel” and not “think” about the posing, let me handle that, because that is when I can capture you at your most natural and beautiful and when I can capture that beautiful inner light that all women have.

Excuse #2: “I have those extra pounds to lose / Do plus size women even do boudoir?”

Every woman at every stage in their life deserves to feel desirable and beautiful. Only 5% of women look like supermodels in this world. That means that more often than not, we all have a little something that we might be sensitive about concerning our bodies, but that doesn’t mean we are unworthy. A professional boudoir photographer is knowledgeable and experienced to know how to style, pose, and light you in the most flattering way. A plus size, curvy woman, is no different than an extra small, petite woman. I will clue you ladies in on a little secret. You know that they say the camera adds 10 pounds? Well, I am here to tell you that a professional boudoir photographer can reduce you by 20 pounds simply with proper lighting and posing! That’s right! No need to wait and lose those weight, I can make you look amazing just the way you are. Because when a woman has confidence in herself, she holds herself differently.  A confident woman shines her wonderful light on all those around her and we all benefit. When we have positive image of ourselves, our family and friends see it and learn from it and apply it to their lives. You will feel more alive and look back on life and your photos and smile about the amazing life you live.

Excuse #3: “I haven’t tried on lingerie in forever”

If lingerie scares you, let me help you. If you feel that I won’t have anything that will fit you? Have no fear. I have a full lingerie closet from XS to 5X and I have developed a keen eye for knowing what looks great on all body types. I will have something that in my extensive wardrobe closet that you will feel and look beautiful in. I guarantee it! It’s like dress-up time. The lingerie fitting is a fun and safe female-only environment which turns into part of the excitement and confidence-boosting from the moment you walk into my studio. Gone are your worries that “nothing will fit me” because I have already curated all the looks, styles, and colors that will accentuate your beauty and body type. No two women are the same. We pick your favorite looks together. We collaborate on a style and look that is unique to you. Having use of my extensive wardrobe closet for your boudoir sessions means that’s it’s one less thing you have to spend money on, and one less thing you have to worry about. And no worries about accessories either, ladies, I have you covered there too. From pearls, to bling, to thigh highs, to garters, to shoes, we have it all for you. If you have any items you’d like to bring from home, we welcome that too!

Excuse #4: “I don’t have the time”

As women, it seems we never have time for ourselves. We give and give to others around us. But we need to remember that without taking a break and practicing proper self-love time, it is harder for us to get re-energized. When was the last time you took time for yourself? When was the last time you did something that was all about you and no one else? When was the last time YOU were the center of attention and everyone was catering to YOUR needs? Taking a few hours to care for yourself, to focus on self-love is a truly healing process for us all. It re-invigorates and uplifts your spirit. When you plan and schedule around “Me” time, it shows others around you that you are important. In turn, they will feel equally important because you are trying to be the best you that you can be. So, it is ok to take some “Me” time and invest in that time in a boudoir shoot because the positive imagery and affirmation of your beauty helps fill in on those days when you need a pick me up or just want to smile while looking at your photo and say “I did that! And I am Fabulous!”

Excuse #5: “A Boudoir shoot is an Investment; I don’t know if I have the money right now”

A transformational boudoir photo shoot like this is an investment. It is expensive, that is true. Think about what things in your life that have been expensive that you have invested in, computer, furniture, clothing, etc. Things that are disposable or will go out of style. When was the last time you invested your hard-earned money in you? When was the last time your investment paid dividends on how you feel about yourself over time? These boudoir sessions experiences and the portraits created are timeless in that they capture the best version of you here and now. But the best part, is that these memories are frozen in time with beautiful imagery that reaffirms your belief in yourself. A time capsule you can continue to refer back to time and again, reminding you of your awesomeness, value and worth. If you felt empowered during your session (and you will), every time you look at these portraits you will feel empowered and beautiful. Its you..beautiful you. How much is that worth to you? Is it expensive.? Yes. Are you worth it? Yes. Do I offer payment plans? Yes. Because I feel every woman deserves this experience and having these confidence boosting memories. I will work with your budget as best as I can because I believe in You, so let’s do it!

Interested in booking a boudoir experience with us?

Come join our private women’s only Facebook Community! 

Our women’s only Facebook Group is all about women uplifting each other. We share our hopes, dreams, inspiration, successes and losses. We are a sisterhood of strong women willing to lend a helping hand to each other and enrich each other’s lives. 

Top 10 Reasons to NOT do a Boudoir Shoot

Why NOT to Do a Boudoir Shoot

Here at Rhea Lewis Photography, we always hear so many excuses why NOT to do a boudoir shoot. We have complied a checklist of the leading 10 factors (i.e. excuses!) we hear regarding why they will certainly not/ need to not/ or can refrain a boudoir shoot.

1) I'm Not Skinny Enough / I Need to Lose More Weight

This is the most common reason we hear for why someone will not book a boudoir shoot. Here’s the heart of it: your shoot has to do with so much more than simply the shape of your body. It’s my task to make you comfortable so I can capture your authentic laugh, the shimmer in your eyes, and all the other peculiarities that make you “YOU”. Besides, expert positioning, lighting, lens option, clothing options, as well as image structure will certainly having you looking slimmer than you have ever thought possible! You are not defined by your dimensions, so do not allow it keep you from really feeling wonderful regarding the goddess you are.

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2) I'm Too Old

The more years you’ve lived, the more you have to celebrate! I have photographed women of all ages, and also many of my all-time-favorite shoots have actually fallen under the 50+ age range. There is a particular sensualism and confidence that comes only with age, and despite the fact that you may not be as toned or tight as you used to be – it honestly could not matter less. I will certainly lead you through wardrobe options and lingerie that will certainly highlight your finest assets and record that fiery nerve that has only gotten more powerful with age!

3) I Don't Want to Spend Money On Myself

Think about it as an investment in your confidence. I especially hear a great deal of moms feeling guilty for spending time and money on themselves rather than their kids. I’m a big believer that you can’t pour from an empty mug, which means it is necessary for children to have a mama that is comfortable in her very own skin and also accepts her body. Wouldn’t you want your children to be able to love and approve their bodies without self-criticism as well as doubt? An investment in yourself IS a financial investment in your family. Not only that, these portraits will likely be just one of the only things you buy this year that really appreciates in value over time.

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4) I Don't Have Anything Sexy to Wear

Well, not wearing anything is definitely an alternative 🙂 But seriously – a boudoir shoot is not buying things or transforming yourself into something you think “ought to” be. While it can be a fun reason to get some new bras or underwear, my favorite way to photograph a lady remains in her favorite day-to-day attire. Even if we deconstruct it a little bit (think: your favorite natural leather coat with simply a bra beneath), your photos should show precisely who you are, and what you feel comfortable in.

5) I Don't Wear Lingerie

Who said you have to wear lingerie? As I discussed above, the best outfits are those that cling your identity. If underwear isn’t your point – let’s determine what your variation of “sexy” is. Perhaps it’s your significant others oversized dress shirt and tie on your feminine figure – or perhaps it’s his sports jacket. You truly can’t fail with the basics – a white cami or a black gown can be as hot as thigh highs any time.

6) I Don't Want My Portraits Online

We take your personal privacy very seriously, and also only post pictures with 100% permission of our customers. We comprehend that doing a boudoir shoot is an exceptionally personal undertaking, and you are in complete control of where your pictures exist after your shoot. To help you celebrate how beautiful you are, we offer a variety of photo books and gift options in discreet packaging.

7) My Spouse / Significant Other wouldn't approve or I'm Single

Every lady agrees after doing the shoot that it was in fact a present to herself. Our studio is a secure, comfy judgement-free area in which you will certainly have the opportunity to really feel gorgeous and also valued. This shoot is really only concerning someone – YOU. You will find you will actually want to gift yourself with mementos of your shoot!

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8) I'm Not Sexy

Unless you are a professional model, not a single woman enters into my studio recognizing exactly how to “look sexy” for their boudoir shoot. This will certainly be the most directed experience of your life. It’s not your duty to recognize how to pose; it’s my task to understand how to coach you. All the females you see in our gallery are regular girls, they are not models, and they are not any different than you. If you bring me your authentic self and a few of your favored articles of clothing, I will certainly help you see exactly how beautiful you really are.

9) I Don't Know How to Do My Hair & Make-up

We count ourselves fortunate to deal with talented makeup artists and hairstylists on every single boudoir shoot we do. We believe having hairstylists as well as make-up artists is an essential component of your shoot, which is why it is included in your session charge. We budget time in your shoot to styling your hair and makeup to highlight your features and show your individual style.

10) [your hang up here]

Your fear and insecurity can come up with unlimited reasons for you to not do anything outside of your comfort zone. It’s a biological feedback to anything we deem “frightening”. It depends on you to decide to give into your fears, or to decide to take a step in loving yourself. If you ‘d like to discover more regarding doing a boudoir shoot, take a look at our site as well as give us a call. We would certainly like to help reveal your internal rockstar.

breast cancer boudoir